an attempt at purging

I'll spit up this blood for your favour

I'll stop shooting up so I can meet you sober

I won't mention what keeps me here

by the time you say hello

I'll fall down 

& shake in your embrace

an end to ideals

We dipped our blood in circumstance

the ink smeared on your lips

and the arrangement wilted at my door

the garden didn't glitter during the seasons

because the air was dry

saluting each day fell into routine 

routine no longer mattered

sleep felt like a sickness

my eyes slowly learned to block out the light

and all i can remember is our uniform tears

our faces pressed together 

as you sucked my kiss--

Insignificant Moments

your lips tasted of vodka and blood

but I allowed you to leave

I stood smoking in the rain

as I watched the taxi carry you into the city

the people walk by with stony faces

carrying black umbrellas

I sat on the curb by the pub

the piano wrapped itself into my numbing toes

and my thoughts danced softly in the rain

drawing on my cigarette

I thought up poetry

but I didn’t write anything down

Understanding the Understatement

Your skin is brimmed with pictures

I saw what was written on your palm

It read all the way down to your elbow

I could not find the author’s name

When I looked into your eyes

I watched as they rolled down that hillside

Shining once

Then disappearing with the sun

Beyond the clouds

Knowing what was going on

And feeling it

Are two different things

Just like me and you

Irrevocably I crossed your name off the list

Stuttering on the last sentence of the poem in class,

I ran out of the room as soon as it was finished.

Plucked Wings

I’m falling out again

Everyone is a part of the disease

Moths are feeding on my soul

I feel completely aware that I’m alive

And golden strings form my pupils

Nothing is beautiful

I looked through your body

You were hiding everything

You were wrong about me.

 

& You never had wings…

EL CAMBIO

You’d be this way

If you heard poison restrict you every hour

That’s when you’d adapt to the malcontented ones

And make your own way through the mist

Don’t look down upon us-the ones that don’t appear as brightly

 

I know:

We both breathe, but my lungs have more smoke than yours

If I’ve changed, you’ve changed too…

Look to the Sky for the Warning

The world feels white

So easy to contaminate with our breath

And my head holds up like cardboard

The threshold was beyond opening

I took a knife to it anyways

The innards resembled clouds

And I was the storm

Through your eyes

The light manifested itself

Mentioning a mindfield of irrationalities,

We spoke of the future with unparallel emotions

You told me, “This is dangerous”

But only the blood seeped in.

We adapted.

Placement

On my mind

On my head

On my lungs

Attached to the water

Sinking.

Demand & Disperse

You call my name out on the staircase

requesting an audience with my eyelids,

"join me in this frostbitten dance."

We all just want a smoke and a quick fix

turning to the ocean, 

eyeing for an escape

"wait for me."

Plunging together.

I left you a note attached to a nameless heart,

"don't tear this note apart."

Because my mouth filled with sand, 

I saw your eyes fill with 

lust.

We Grew Up To Be Gravediggers

I saw the rabbit in the whites of your eyes

your pupils move like pendulums,

but your heart just

drops.

I heard your voice, 

you were singing along

The light rises then it falls 

just like marbles being dropped.

Light up your own cigarette.

This is the city 

and the birds have none to spare.

We've got a box of Crayolas,

but we just draw the Earth ashen.

I couldn't be scared if I tried

because you told me with your tongue, 

"glass hearts mix better broken, 

so kill while you're young"

In the Rain

I'm going straight down this time

getting the page dirty in the process

I can't control it though

I saw your reflection in the knife

and felt your words on my shoulder

What you screamed at me

is not what you told her.

I'm Trying to Quit

your lips

are the strongest daggers

my thoughts

kill faster than words

.